The story of …
(victim survivor has chosen to remain anonymous and not be identified)
Many women are too embarrassed to speak up, straighten your crown, and never forget who your mother is and where you come from. Take an active....ACTIVE .... role in assisting parents with maintenance applications and arrears, many mothers have no support.
I'm broken, I'm tired, I'm depressed, I'm scared, I'm sad, I'm starting to feel like giving up but how can you give up on your child! Between the financial and emotional abuse, and constantly being pushed over...
I am speaking up to help our next generation of mom’s, dad’s and children. I cry just thinking of my son having to apply for maintenance when he turns 18, this abuse is so draining. The Department of Justice implies there is justice, there is no justice.
Where to start, last week the father of my child told me that he knew that withholding my son’s maintenance and making me beg 12-15 times a month was wrong, but, as he said “I enjoy the game I make you play with me”.
I went to court twelve times last year, he didn’t pitch once, the warrant of execution was never delivered, I’m sitting with a mountain of debt and a bigger mountain of arrears while he drives his brand new Suzuki and gets new shoes. I’m struggling to maintain the lifestyle we chose as co-parents to provide for our son, he earns more than double what I earn but still can’t afford the court order of 48% of son’s costs.
I’m broken, I’m tired, I’m depressed, I’m scared, I’m sad, I’m starting to feel like giving up but how can you give up on your child! Between the financial and emotional abuse, and constantly being pushed over to someone else in the Maintenance system and never receiving meaningful help or assistance, I feel like anyone would….I feel like a victim.
When I left my relationship, the abuse got worse, financial abuse is the abuse of choice since I left alongside the emotional and mental abuse. There is not enough awareness of economic and financial abuse as a form of gender based violence.
Many women are too embarrassed to speak up, straighten your crown, and never forget who your mother is and where you come from. Take an active….ACTIVE …. role in assisting parents with maintenance applications and arrears, many mothers have no support.
16 days of activism: story 2
16 days of activism: story 3
Institute for Social Development & Justice is a South African based non-profit organisation focused on transforming gendered economic inequality through social development and economic and financial protection (and recovery) through the enforcement of maintenance agreements and enforcement of domestic violence protection orders. Our aim is to continue after 16 days of activism to bring about change and strive for 365 days of activism against GBV and abuse.